The test

My dad is famous for his random knowledge. He knows tons of stuff most people never think about. If I have a question about history, nature, how something works, or something totally obscure, etc... he's my "go to guy". Chances are he'll know the answer.

He's a learning disabilities teacher, and a few weeks ago he was telling me about this "test" to determine how smart your child is, and then demonstrated it on Caleb. It goes something like this...

He gave Caleb two jelly beans (which he LOVES) and told him very simply and matter of factly that the jelly beans belonged to him (Caleb). He could do anything he wanted with him. He could eat them immediately, HOWEVER, if he waited until we went home later that night, he would fill up a Dixie cup with jelly beans and he could have them all. He let Caleb see the Dixie cup and jar of jelly beans.

Now -- as a side note, the key to this "test" is that you can't make a big deal out of it. The child has to know the "small" item is theirs if they want it now, but if they wait, they get something better/bigger/etc... in the future. You can't tell them, "If I were you I'd do _________". The decision of what to do is solely theirs.

This simple test is an early and accurate indication of intelligence. In measures the child's ability to delay immediate gratification in favor of long term success. In other words, can they think in the long term to make the best decision, or will they take the "feel good, easy way out". Evidently, it's a good predictor of how a child will do in school (will they put in the time and study hard to do well on a test), how much success they'll have in college (will they party all night, etc) and how they'll do in the workforce, etc... It definitely makes sense to me.

So Caleb -- how'd he do on this test?? Any guesses???

After my dad gave him the jelly beans and told him he could have many more IF he waited until he went home later that night, he looked at my dad and got that little twinkle in his eye and shoved those two jelly beans in his mouth as fast as possible!! Oh, and if I remember correctly he squealed in delight. Now .... it's not that he didn't understand the prospect. Oh no... it was exactly the opposite! Right after he swallowed them down, he said something like, "I know you'll give me more Pop-pops! You always share with me and you love me!!". Great... He knows he's got my dad wrapped around his little finger. Not exactly sure where that puts him on the test, but the outcome is SOOOOO Caleb. LOL!! I didn't expect anything else out of him!!

So last night, I decided to do the same test on Katherine. I gave her the same little speech. I told her that I sent some licorice nibs in her lunch. If she brought them home and didn't eat them, I'd have "something" better for her. I didn't tell her what "something" was, but just that it'd be better than the licorice nibs in her lunch. I also told her it was her decision, and if she wanted to eat the nibs with her lunch, that was fine with me. I didn't care either way. She could do what she wanted.

All day I was thinking about her and wondering what she'd do. She was at school, with her peers and without me around to guide her or give her any direction whatsoever. Would she eat the Nibs or bring them home? Would she make the decision to wait for something better in the future or would she just chow 'em down like Caleb did?

Any guesses?????

After school she went over to Olivia's house for a play date, and while I was talking to Melissa (her mom) on the phone, I told her to ask Katherine where the Nibs were. I heard Katherine laugh in the background. "They're in my lunch box! I wasn't about to eat them. I'm too smart for that. My mommy is giving me something WAAAAYYY better when I get home".

That's my girl! She gets it. She does the right thing, even when I'm not around to guide her and remind her of what she "should" do. She's responsible. She's thoughtful. She's forward thinking. She knows what she wants and isn't afraid to delay immediate gratification. I'm so proud of her. So proud of all that she is and who she's becoming. So proud to be her mom. So proud of her.